No way but through
It has been such a long time since I've written anything closely resembling honest, real, heart-felt insight. To tell you the truth, it's been a while since I've had clarity. Since I've felt a oneness with all things divine... which has been my clarity.
I guess that when your life becomes immersed in the daily grind, in struggling to keep afloat amidst all the bills, the adjustments, the unexpected occurence of circumstances that yank you out of your beloved womb, the increasingly irritating myopia of fear and a general sense of "man, oh man, I'm scared shit after all"... well amidst all that... life becomes kinda tricky... you begin to lose your grounding...
These past couple of weeks, I've been through a tunneling journey through hell, feeling myself suddenly thrust into a dark hole in the ground with nothing to hold on to, not even knowing how to hold on, not knowing which part of myself to hold on with. Eventually though, you just let go and let the fall take you to whatever hell you need to get through. As I've told myself countless times before, when things got rough... "No way but through, tins, no way but through." So instead of holding on to something that reinforces the fear, I held on to something that has never failed me yet.
The trust.
It's this trust in the inherent goodness and direction of the universe that has gotten me through. Yet again.
So now... the time has come to regain that sense of wakefulness... to be mindful of the universe's voice... to try to put aside the arrogance of the human mind and learn to listen to the path once again.
I guess that when your life becomes immersed in the daily grind, in struggling to keep afloat amidst all the bills, the adjustments, the unexpected occurence of circumstances that yank you out of your beloved womb, the increasingly irritating myopia of fear and a general sense of "man, oh man, I'm scared shit after all"... well amidst all that... life becomes kinda tricky... you begin to lose your grounding...
These past couple of weeks, I've been through a tunneling journey through hell, feeling myself suddenly thrust into a dark hole in the ground with nothing to hold on to, not even knowing how to hold on, not knowing which part of myself to hold on with. Eventually though, you just let go and let the fall take you to whatever hell you need to get through. As I've told myself countless times before, when things got rough... "No way but through, tins, no way but through." So instead of holding on to something that reinforces the fear, I held on to something that has never failed me yet.
The trust.
It's this trust in the inherent goodness and direction of the universe that has gotten me through. Yet again.
So now... the time has come to regain that sense of wakefulness... to be mindful of the universe's voice... to try to put aside the arrogance of the human mind and learn to listen to the path once again.
2 Comments:
when we need to find that path, the light leading to it shines the brightest.
hi jey! yes, that is true. thanks for reminding me...
hope all is well with you
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